Whenever someone asks me why I became a counselor, I have two answers. One-I always knew I was meant to help people and two-it aligns with my natural personality. I am a born adventurer, I love getting lost in a good story, and I was never afraid of the dark!

While I’ve always had the desire to help people, the specific way I do so is largely based on my own lived experiences, my own shadow work, and my own self-exploration. I’m a firm believer that you can’t take anyone further on the path than you yourself have been willing to go, which is why my journey of self-discovery is ever ongoing. 

One of the most important things I’ve discovered that impacts our overall well-being, either positively or negatively, is the quality of the relationship with the self. Most people just exist within themselves without ever creating an intentional relationship or realizing having a relationship with yourself even matters.

In developing a deeper relationship with myself one of the biggest areas I found that needed healing was my inner dialogue (hello inner critic). Most of us are much harder on ourselves than we are on anyone else and I am no exception. So I started holding myself accountable for how I spoke to myself. 

When I found myself being overly critical, negative, or judgmental, I would then stand in front of the mirror, look myself in the eyes, and apologize for what I had said to me, the same way I would apologize to someone else if I had hurt their feelings. While the process itself initially felt awkward, it helped my inner critic become my inner cheerleader. Realistically the shift happened because I just got tired of having to apologize to myself and it became easier to just be nice to me to begin with!

The more I allowed myself to cheerlead me, the more I actually started to believe in myself again. Believe that I was actually capable of reaching my goals the same way that I believed in myself when I was 5. 

As a 5 year old playing in the sandbox, my friends and I believed that if we just dug for long enough that we would eventually make it to Australia. Like we actually believed it. Everyday we’d run to the sandbox and excitedly start digging thinking “today might be the day we make it!” It never occurred to us to doubt that possibility.

Do you remember that feeling I’m talking about? When you believed anything was possible and that you were capable? What lights me up is getting to help people like you get back to their sandbox moments!